Good Morning Folks!
OK, day #2 of my blog. I'm actually proud of myself for returning. After all, this is not the first blog I've started over the years. Maybe this one will stick.
Now for the explanation of my title. I admit to reading the book AND seeing the movie "The Notebook". However, that being said, I saw that movie prior to AD bombing my family. I found it funny, gripping, silly at times, and ultimately may have shed a tear at the end. Not an easy feat for me, as anyone that knows me well will testify to the fact that I am NOT a cryer.... not for anything. Flash forward to After Alzheimer's entered my life, and the only good thing I can muster up about that story, is the fact that they succeeded in showing us a picture of the heroine's life before Alzheimer's, perhaps being the only good thing about the movie. I guess my point in this blog is about knowing my mother. She wasn't always the person that she is today. Marjorie had lead quite a life, and I think that it deserves some mention here, before I start telling you about the present day. Let's learn a little more about my Mother.
Marjorie was born on April 21, 1931 in Glasgow, Scotland. Her parents were David and Peggy (Margaret) Gamble and Marjorie was the 10th of a total of 12 children. Yes, they were good catholics. Peggy spent a better part of her life pregnant. Shortly after Marjorie's birth, she was handed over to be adopted by Helen and Anthony of Renfrew, Scotland. Helen was Peggy's younger sister, and was unable to have children of her own. Being the time it was, and the fact that Peggy had hoards of kids, she kindly and selflessly gave one to her little sister. So legally adopted (or as legal as it gets in the 30's.... Mum's name on her birth certificate remained that of her birth parents.), she was raised by Anthony and Helen (affectionately know to all as "Tony and Ellen")
I think Marjorie had a good life growing up as an only child. Ellen spoiled her, as did Tony, both grateful for their blessing, I guess. Mum visited often with her siblings (or cousins, as she knew them), and she grew up loved, clothed, safe and secure, despite the food rations, bomb shelters and other horrific things they endured as a family during the war. Marjorie never speaks much of that, just a story here and there of how they lost their home, and had to run to shelters a few times when the bombs fell. I'm not sure what age Mum found out she was adopted, but I do know that she never, EVER told me until this last few years. Only my sister and my Father knew. It was a deep, dark family secret that she never wanted anyone to know.
Marjorie was a spirited child, well liked, polite and very adventurous. This sat well with Tony, who loved to take her fishing and hiking, but not so well with Helen, who adored her and loved to dress her little girl and do her hair in ringlets. As Marjorie grew older, their relationship deteriorated. Ellen was frequently ill and hospitalized for her Asthma, which also added to the distance between them. Looking back and listening to the stories, my sister and I are convinced that our Grandma (Ellen) suffered from some severe depression or other mental illness. It's sad to think that there was nothing available yet to help her.
Marjorie met Patrick (my Dad) at a fairly young age. He was attending the University of Glasgow, for medicine and Marjorie, by this time had been discovered by a photographer and was beginning a modelling career in London. They had a whirlwind romance, during which time Patrick spent alot of time away with the navy, but finally, he came home from North Korea and married Marjorie on December 17, 1950.
And there began a lifetime of travelling, parties, children, adventures and many more things that I couldn't begin to fit into one blog entry. But I will certainly try to tell you alot of them.
I think one flash-back per blog entry is sufficient. I don't want to lose you in the story, but rather keep your interest. Which is why I titled this the way I did. Both movies succeed in giving a good background of the person with AD, which I think is very important. As the primary care-giver to an AD patient, it is very easy to lose sight of the person you love and want to take care of, because that is not who you end up caring for. AD robs them of their personality, their quirks and traits that made them unique as a human being, along with so many other things. I try desperately to remember Marjorie from when she was actually Marjorie. She was a fantastic Mum (a little unconventional at times) but fantastic. I would bet my last dollar that she would sit down and laugh with me, if I were to tell her some of the things she does now. But I can't. And that is why between the two movies, "Away from her" is hands down, without a doubt the winner in portraying a true picture or experience of what Alzheimer's is like.
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