I haven't blogged in almost a week. I received feedback from a few people, and it wasn't good. Apparently, they find my blog depressing, distressing, sad...... and they usually look to me for humour, laughter, uplifting advice, and find my blog to be the complete opposite of what they perceive me to be.
Hmmmmmmm....... could it be that I am living a facade? Could it be that I portray somebody completely different when I am outside the confines of my house? Maybe, but I doubt it. I've generally been a happy person through-out my life. Upbeat, humorous, funny....... but sometimes life brings you stuff that you just cannot find the humour in......maybe that's what I'm up against now. I thought I was doing a good job of poking fun at my situation, at my Marjorie's situation. And when I say poking fun.... I mean absolutely NO disrespect to my Mother, none at all. Would she be horrified at the fact that I am writing about this disease and our journey through it? I don't know. I have asked myself that question many times as I write stuff here, and the answer I usually come to is this: "Mum would be horrified, if I were writing this stuff about her. Yes. She would, and I know this. But when I write about my Mum, its all good. When I write about Marjorie, the person that Mum has now become, as a result of Alzheimer's disease, I am writing about a complete stranger. That stranger just happens to look alot like my Mum, live with me, and I care for her."
So I hope that I have made my distinction between the two entities, Marjorie and Mum, very, very clear. They are two completely different people. My Mum is almost completely gone. Today, at this moment, I don't know if I'll ever see her again. I'm hoping I will, I'm almost sure that I will, but if I don't, I know that the last time I did, I told her I loved her, and that I would take care of her, and that I would keep her safe and sound. That all her kids loved her, all her grandchildren, and that everything was going to be just fine.
I'll do the same again, if I'm lucky enough to get a chance at it again.
Gee... maybe my critics are correct, this is sort of depressing. :)
peace out.
Sunday, December 19, 2010
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
The Fat guy in the Red Suit.
Today, I am struggling whether or not to blog the truth about yesterday. Or this last month, if I'm honest.... Wondering if I should sugar coat it, dip it in chocolate... sweeten it up a bit before I pour it out on the page. I'm wondering if everyone who reads it, can handle it.
First let me give you a run-down of events. I am in my last push to obtain fundraising and donations for the the Special Olympics, which we, as a hometown club, are hosting next yr on Jan 9th. So I am busy and a little stressed with the responses I have been getting over the last three or four days. But that's just a small part of it. Then there is me. My health. Well..... not the greatest news yesterday, but it's news, it's something to go on, it's plain facts... black and white, it's all self-inflicted. Self-inflicted. Great, another thing I've done that I can beat myself up on. Maybe I'll have some ice cream.
Then there are the kids. What happened to my kids? They are mouthy, entitled, spoiled rotten, defiant little turds these days. Oh... I love them.... there is no doubt in my mind about that.... I just don't LIKE them right now. What a difference a year makes. No more "Santa" in my house. I was sort of relieved last year, when it happened. After all, I was sick of doing all the work and some fat, fictitious guy in a red suit (mostly the guy at the mall) was getting all the credit. Sit back on Christmas morning, watching their little faces glow with excitement, looking at me and saying "SEE Mum? I was good, after all... Santa thought so" I felt like saying "Gee... wonder if Santa kept the receipt for that so he can return it......"
So here we are, this year.... no more Santa. Yes... I felt a little relieved, but I have to be honest, I realize something now...... the fictitious fat guy held more clout that me!!! He really did. Santa! How the hell do you maintain that jolly, holly exterior.... but still manage to instill fear in children's hearts worldwide... thus scaring them into being good for AT LEAST the two weeks prior to Christmas???? I'm lost on this one, cause my children are running around wild, like little savages, talking back, getting bad grades on their "dictae" (you know who I'm talking about), refusing household chores, fighting and screaming at each other and finally... the absolute best... completely and totally ignoring me when and if I attempt to communicate with them!!!!!! But wait! There's more.... last nite, on one of the RARE occasions that they were actually conversing without punching or screaming at each other ... I hear my son say "When I get my "such and such" and my "this" for Christmas, it will be TOTALLY EPIC"....... my daughter replies... "Oh I know.... I'm getting a "such and such" and a "such and such". I cannot wait. You see, now that they are aware of Santa's non-existence, they seem not only a little older and wiser..... they also seem very entitled and sure of themselves. I tried the whole "Christmas is around the corner... and I'd be good if I were you....." got nothing. Nope. They are both hell on wheels and someone, anyone, needs to take gunfire at their back tires. But how? The only thing that comes to mind is that I let them wake up on Christmas morning, with no presents under the tree. But in doing that I risk standing there, @ 8am.... with a coffee in my hand (laced with bailey's) and blurting " see? told yah so. I"M SANTA now...... and SANTA is IN THE HOUSE WITH NO PRESENTS!!! How do you like THEM APPLES!!!!!!!!" and that would just be mean. Or would it?
All I know is that I wish I had Santa's clout.
peace out.
First let me give you a run-down of events. I am in my last push to obtain fundraising and donations for the the Special Olympics, which we, as a hometown club, are hosting next yr on Jan 9th. So I am busy and a little stressed with the responses I have been getting over the last three or four days. But that's just a small part of it. Then there is me. My health. Well..... not the greatest news yesterday, but it's news, it's something to go on, it's plain facts... black and white, it's all self-inflicted. Self-inflicted. Great, another thing I've done that I can beat myself up on. Maybe I'll have some ice cream.
Then there are the kids. What happened to my kids? They are mouthy, entitled, spoiled rotten, defiant little turds these days. Oh... I love them.... there is no doubt in my mind about that.... I just don't LIKE them right now. What a difference a year makes. No more "Santa" in my house. I was sort of relieved last year, when it happened. After all, I was sick of doing all the work and some fat, fictitious guy in a red suit (mostly the guy at the mall) was getting all the credit. Sit back on Christmas morning, watching their little faces glow with excitement, looking at me and saying "SEE Mum? I was good, after all... Santa thought so" I felt like saying "Gee... wonder if Santa kept the receipt for that so he can return it......"
So here we are, this year.... no more Santa. Yes... I felt a little relieved, but I have to be honest, I realize something now...... the fictitious fat guy held more clout that me!!! He really did. Santa! How the hell do you maintain that jolly, holly exterior.... but still manage to instill fear in children's hearts worldwide... thus scaring them into being good for AT LEAST the two weeks prior to Christmas???? I'm lost on this one, cause my children are running around wild, like little savages, talking back, getting bad grades on their "dictae" (you know who I'm talking about), refusing household chores, fighting and screaming at each other and finally... the absolute best... completely and totally ignoring me when and if I attempt to communicate with them!!!!!! But wait! There's more.... last nite, on one of the RARE occasions that they were actually conversing without punching or screaming at each other ... I hear my son say "When I get my "such and such" and my "this" for Christmas, it will be TOTALLY EPIC"....... my daughter replies... "Oh I know.... I'm getting a "such and such" and a "such and such". I cannot wait. You see, now that they are aware of Santa's non-existence, they seem not only a little older and wiser..... they also seem very entitled and sure of themselves. I tried the whole "Christmas is around the corner... and I'd be good if I were you....." got nothing. Nope. They are both hell on wheels and someone, anyone, needs to take gunfire at their back tires. But how? The only thing that comes to mind is that I let them wake up on Christmas morning, with no presents under the tree. But in doing that I risk standing there, @ 8am.... with a coffee in my hand (laced with bailey's) and blurting " see? told yah so. I"M SANTA now...... and SANTA is IN THE HOUSE WITH NO PRESENTS!!! How do you like THEM APPLES!!!!!!!!" and that would just be mean. Or would it?
All I know is that I wish I had Santa's clout.
peace out.
Monday, December 13, 2010
The Bull Horn
I took Sunday off......from blogging, that is. You see, when you are a caregiver, you never have time off. Ok, when the person with dementia is sleeping, eating, fixated on a tv show, folding laundry or calm..... you get some respite. Actually, let me re-phrase that..... you get some respite, but your guard is never down.
Unless you have hired help, which I am in the process of getting, you are always on.... 24-7..... at least your guard is.
Lately, Marjorie has taken to opening the front door. Live and learn. Had I known back then, what I know now, I would've put the door to her bedroom closer to the kitchen when we were building this house. Yes, she has taken to opening up the front door. To clarify, I have her room alarmed, meaning that when she opens the door to her room, a chime goes off. I have alarm pads upstairs, in my bedroom, to warn me that she is "on the move". And until this last week or so, Marjorie has been content leaving her room, to discover the inside of the house, never to venture farther than the kitchen. By the time the chime wakes me, and I leap out of my bed, pull some pj bottoms on and get my (really large) butt down those long set of stairs, Marjorie has usually made it to the kitchen. A hard right from her bedroom.
Lately though, she has been taking a hard LEFT to the front door, unlocking and opening it up. She has yet to step outside, but I wonder if she would, if I wasn't there to intervene.
Let's think about the stories we hear on the news. We've all heard them, about elderly people wandering off and going missing. Sometimes it's in the middle of winter, others it's in the summer. Sometimes they are recovered unharmed, other times they perish in the outdoors.... lost forever.
Now I am the first to admit that I would hear these stories, and I would think "gawd... who the HELL let's an elderly person go outside like that, no clothes, especially when they are senile???" Now I understand. You see, Alzheimer's changes a person's brain. When I am cooking something, let's say, in the frying pan, and Marjorie thinks that it's the sound of rain, there is no telling her differently. In her mind, it's rain. You cannot convince her otherwise. When she wants to, or doesn't want to wear a certain outfit, there is no coercing her. When trying to bathe her, she is insistent that she JUST had a shower 20 minutes ago, you cannot change her mind. And when she thinks that she needs to be somewhere, that she has tickets on a plane or a train, you have to go along with it. There is no changing an AD sufferer's mind. So when you hear of an elderly person going missing, they are following their need to be somewhere, on time. They generally don't know where they are going, but they know they have to get there. This is what drives Marjorie to open that front door every nite now. She truly believes she is going somewhere, that she has to be somewhere, at that specific time. What is scary is that it's very cold here right now, and last nite I said "Mum!! it's below freezing out there, and raining!!!!" Marjorie looked at me and said "that is why I am wearing a rain coat!!!" she was wearing her housecoat.
So yes, I do get respite when Marjorie is sleeping..... but I can never truly let my guard down. Sleep with one eye open, senses always on high alert, and the bull horn. Oh, did I forget to tell you about the bull horn?
Yes, well, we all have one. Every house with an alarm does. So if I miss that 10 second window that I have to punch my code in, the bull horn goes off. It's a loud, obnoxious sound that would literally wake the dead. Unless you are a husband or child of mine. Yes... amidst my story of Marjorie and her soulful wandering, I forgot to mention that none of my other family members.... not one... not even Ozzie, my faithful guard dog, not one of them wakes up to the bull horn. The next morning they look at me like I'm crazy, when I ask them if they heard the bull horn. Nope... not one of them. Slept like babies.
And people wonder why I don't let the kids, or my hubby step in and watch Mum..... even for an hour or so...... why? Because of the bull horn... that's why.
peace out.
Unless you have hired help, which I am in the process of getting, you are always on.... 24-7..... at least your guard is.
Lately, Marjorie has taken to opening the front door. Live and learn. Had I known back then, what I know now, I would've put the door to her bedroom closer to the kitchen when we were building this house. Yes, she has taken to opening up the front door. To clarify, I have her room alarmed, meaning that when she opens the door to her room, a chime goes off. I have alarm pads upstairs, in my bedroom, to warn me that she is "on the move". And until this last week or so, Marjorie has been content leaving her room, to discover the inside of the house, never to venture farther than the kitchen. By the time the chime wakes me, and I leap out of my bed, pull some pj bottoms on and get my (really large) butt down those long set of stairs, Marjorie has usually made it to the kitchen. A hard right from her bedroom.
Lately though, she has been taking a hard LEFT to the front door, unlocking and opening it up. She has yet to step outside, but I wonder if she would, if I wasn't there to intervene.
Let's think about the stories we hear on the news. We've all heard them, about elderly people wandering off and going missing. Sometimes it's in the middle of winter, others it's in the summer. Sometimes they are recovered unharmed, other times they perish in the outdoors.... lost forever.
Now I am the first to admit that I would hear these stories, and I would think "gawd... who the HELL let's an elderly person go outside like that, no clothes, especially when they are senile???" Now I understand. You see, Alzheimer's changes a person's brain. When I am cooking something, let's say, in the frying pan, and Marjorie thinks that it's the sound of rain, there is no telling her differently. In her mind, it's rain. You cannot convince her otherwise. When she wants to, or doesn't want to wear a certain outfit, there is no coercing her. When trying to bathe her, she is insistent that she JUST had a shower 20 minutes ago, you cannot change her mind. And when she thinks that she needs to be somewhere, that she has tickets on a plane or a train, you have to go along with it. There is no changing an AD sufferer's mind. So when you hear of an elderly person going missing, they are following their need to be somewhere, on time. They generally don't know where they are going, but they know they have to get there. This is what drives Marjorie to open that front door every nite now. She truly believes she is going somewhere, that she has to be somewhere, at that specific time. What is scary is that it's very cold here right now, and last nite I said "Mum!! it's below freezing out there, and raining!!!!" Marjorie looked at me and said "that is why I am wearing a rain coat!!!" she was wearing her housecoat.
So yes, I do get respite when Marjorie is sleeping..... but I can never truly let my guard down. Sleep with one eye open, senses always on high alert, and the bull horn. Oh, did I forget to tell you about the bull horn?
Yes, well, we all have one. Every house with an alarm does. So if I miss that 10 second window that I have to punch my code in, the bull horn goes off. It's a loud, obnoxious sound that would literally wake the dead. Unless you are a husband or child of mine. Yes... amidst my story of Marjorie and her soulful wandering, I forgot to mention that none of my other family members.... not one... not even Ozzie, my faithful guard dog, not one of them wakes up to the bull horn. The next morning they look at me like I'm crazy, when I ask them if they heard the bull horn. Nope... not one of them. Slept like babies.
And people wonder why I don't let the kids, or my hubby step in and watch Mum..... even for an hour or so...... why? Because of the bull horn... that's why.
peace out.
Saturday, December 11, 2010
Why we do the things we do.....
Ok people... I only have two followers... get off your asses.. get a google account and become a follower. Make me feel loved for gawd sakes!
http://www.nia.nih.gov/Alzheimers/Publications/adfact.htm
I just found this website last nite. It's a decent one, giving actual facts that are easy to understand. According to the Internet (which isn't always the most reliable source) roughly between 2.4 and 5.3 million Americans are currently suffering from Alzheimer's related dementia. (sorry, I do not have the Canadian numbers this morning). The reason for the vast difference in the numbers is that alot of the time, the person does not get diagnosed, officially, with the disease. The health care system being the way that it is in the US, alot of people slip through the cracks, never being diagnosed OR treated for the disease. I really find this heartbreaking and unthinkable.... that a human being can have this disease, live with it for many years, and not have the medication and/or medical resources needed to be cared for properly. It actually boggles my mind.
I know there are a lot of you out there, that know me and my situation, who don't quite understand why I have chosen to care for Mum @ home. Believe me, I understand your questions. I rant alot, I'm stressed out, I complain, I bitch, I'm tired.......... but it's a choice I have made mainly due to many contributing factors. Some I am able to explain easily, others I am not.
First of all, she was my mother. Unconventional, quirky, always a hint of a little crazy (let me stress a GOOD crazy) but when the chips fell, a good mother. When I tell stories of my childhood, they are fundamentally good stories, happy stories and for that, I am eternally grateful to her. I feel like I am not near as good of a mother to my children, as she was to me. That may be a off-tilt view, but it's how I see things.
I am aware that I had a very co-dependant relationship with my Mother. As I grew older, the co-dependency increased. We went from a mother-daughter relationship to more of a mother-daughter-confident-friend relationship, if that makes any sense. I spoke to her every day, sometimes numerous times during the day. I never went a full day without calling her, or answering her call. When I was still working, I had 8-8:30am blocked off on my calendar, every day, to take her call. I actually moved meetings when I could, or worked around this half hour slot, just so I could take that call. We discussed everything, good and bad. Mum knew everything about my life, and I knew everything about hers. We both harbour many of each other's secrets, dreams, disappointments, mistakes, regrets and triumphs....... alot of which we will both take to our graves. :)
My Mum got me out of more bad situations, mistakes, relationships, jobs, financial crunches..... she just saved me alot.
When I was 16 years old, and not being the easiest teenager, we started to go for coffee at Peter Jianopolous's Dad's cafe (He was a kid in my class..... nice kid.....) It was a greasy little spoon down on front street, in between the book store and the dollar store. It was a long and dark cafe, with Naugahyde benches and really cheesy decor. We would meet there , sit and have coffee and lunch and talk. It became our "place" and we continued to go there well after I had moved away from home,, when I would return on weekends and/or holidays. Eventually, we stopped going there, and a few years passed and then one time when I was home, during one of Dad's many emergency illness', I took Mum there for lunch. We sat in our booth, we re-connected with Peter's Mum and sister (who ran the greasy spoon) and it was then that Mum sat across from me and cried and cried, because she didn't think that Dad was going to survive this latest bout of illness. She was truly terrified about her future. Now, looking back, that would make Mum around 68 and she was probably experiencing alot of symptoms of the mild stages of AD. She confided that she could not survive without my father, and that she had absolutely no idea what she would do, where she would live etc. She did know that she did not want to live without her husband. At that moment, I realized that she was completely dependant on my father. I didn't know about the Alzheimer's yet, but the symptoms must have been showing by now, and I now realize she was absolutely terrified at the thought of being alone, without my Dad. At this point, I had two children, under the age of 3. I lived in a very small house, semi-detached and we were already cramped. But I offered her to come and live with me, told her that she would always have a space with us and that she would always be welcome. This next part is funny, because she flatly refused and said that if she was going to be left alone, and forced to live with anyone, it would be the wisest choice to move out west with my brother. In a single sentence, she shot me down. Looking back at this, I am only just able to begin to understand why she said that, because it's what Dad wanted for her. After all, with Dad, it was all about his three boys....... they always came first.
Of course that all changed, and as Dad deteriorated, and he got worse, and it became clearly apparent that he was never leaving that hospital...... Mum came to live with me. By this time we had moved, into a bigger house, still not big enough to house us all, but bigger than the last. And so it began....... the ripple of events that followed to bring us where we are today.
Yes, co-dependant..... that is the best way to describe my relationship, earlier on, with my mother. Now the dependency is basically a one way street, but that's ok. That's my decision. But now you know a little more about why I chose this route. because of the woman she once used to be.....but also because of the woman she has become. My Mum.... the one that raised us, would probably have refused all and any care offered to here....... Now? Marjorie NEEDS all the care and support she can get, as she cannot function without it.
So when I'm bitching, griping and being mean about Marjorie, please remember that I really loved my Mum, and I'm doing this for her. I wonder if this made sense?
http://www.nia.nih.gov/Alzheimers/Publications/adfact.htm
I just found this website last nite. It's a decent one, giving actual facts that are easy to understand. According to the Internet (which isn't always the most reliable source) roughly between 2.4 and 5.3 million Americans are currently suffering from Alzheimer's related dementia. (sorry, I do not have the Canadian numbers this morning). The reason for the vast difference in the numbers is that alot of the time, the person does not get diagnosed, officially, with the disease. The health care system being the way that it is in the US, alot of people slip through the cracks, never being diagnosed OR treated for the disease. I really find this heartbreaking and unthinkable.... that a human being can have this disease, live with it for many years, and not have the medication and/or medical resources needed to be cared for properly. It actually boggles my mind.
I know there are a lot of you out there, that know me and my situation, who don't quite understand why I have chosen to care for Mum @ home. Believe me, I understand your questions. I rant alot, I'm stressed out, I complain, I bitch, I'm tired.......... but it's a choice I have made mainly due to many contributing factors. Some I am able to explain easily, others I am not.
First of all, she was my mother. Unconventional, quirky, always a hint of a little crazy (let me stress a GOOD crazy) but when the chips fell, a good mother. When I tell stories of my childhood, they are fundamentally good stories, happy stories and for that, I am eternally grateful to her. I feel like I am not near as good of a mother to my children, as she was to me. That may be a off-tilt view, but it's how I see things.
I am aware that I had a very co-dependant relationship with my Mother. As I grew older, the co-dependency increased. We went from a mother-daughter relationship to more of a mother-daughter-confident-friend relationship, if that makes any sense. I spoke to her every day, sometimes numerous times during the day. I never went a full day without calling her, or answering her call. When I was still working, I had 8-8:30am blocked off on my calendar, every day, to take her call. I actually moved meetings when I could, or worked around this half hour slot, just so I could take that call. We discussed everything, good and bad. Mum knew everything about my life, and I knew everything about hers. We both harbour many of each other's secrets, dreams, disappointments, mistakes, regrets and triumphs....... alot of which we will both take to our graves. :)
My Mum got me out of more bad situations, mistakes, relationships, jobs, financial crunches..... she just saved me alot.
When I was 16 years old, and not being the easiest teenager, we started to go for coffee at Peter Jianopolous's Dad's cafe (He was a kid in my class..... nice kid.....) It was a greasy little spoon down on front street, in between the book store and the dollar store. It was a long and dark cafe, with Naugahyde benches and really cheesy decor. We would meet there , sit and have coffee and lunch and talk. It became our "place" and we continued to go there well after I had moved away from home,, when I would return on weekends and/or holidays. Eventually, we stopped going there, and a few years passed and then one time when I was home, during one of Dad's many emergency illness', I took Mum there for lunch. We sat in our booth, we re-connected with Peter's Mum and sister (who ran the greasy spoon) and it was then that Mum sat across from me and cried and cried, because she didn't think that Dad was going to survive this latest bout of illness. She was truly terrified about her future. Now, looking back, that would make Mum around 68 and she was probably experiencing alot of symptoms of the mild stages of AD. She confided that she could not survive without my father, and that she had absolutely no idea what she would do, where she would live etc. She did know that she did not want to live without her husband. At that moment, I realized that she was completely dependant on my father. I didn't know about the Alzheimer's yet, but the symptoms must have been showing by now, and I now realize she was absolutely terrified at the thought of being alone, without my Dad. At this point, I had two children, under the age of 3. I lived in a very small house, semi-detached and we were already cramped. But I offered her to come and live with me, told her that she would always have a space with us and that she would always be welcome. This next part is funny, because she flatly refused and said that if she was going to be left alone, and forced to live with anyone, it would be the wisest choice to move out west with my brother. In a single sentence, she shot me down. Looking back at this, I am only just able to begin to understand why she said that, because it's what Dad wanted for her. After all, with Dad, it was all about his three boys....... they always came first.
Of course that all changed, and as Dad deteriorated, and he got worse, and it became clearly apparent that he was never leaving that hospital...... Mum came to live with me. By this time we had moved, into a bigger house, still not big enough to house us all, but bigger than the last. And so it began....... the ripple of events that followed to bring us where we are today.
Yes, co-dependant..... that is the best way to describe my relationship, earlier on, with my mother. Now the dependency is basically a one way street, but that's ok. That's my decision. But now you know a little more about why I chose this route. because of the woman she once used to be.....but also because of the woman she has become. My Mum.... the one that raised us, would probably have refused all and any care offered to here....... Now? Marjorie NEEDS all the care and support she can get, as she cannot function without it.
So when I'm bitching, griping and being mean about Marjorie, please remember that I really loved my Mum, and I'm doing this for her. I wonder if this made sense?
Friday, December 10, 2010
Well it's official. We've made the switch. After weeks of watching the same 5 episodes of Dancing with the Stars over and over again (yes... the one with Jennifer Grey and the Palin chick.... how long has it been since that was actually a current show?)....... I've finally and successfully switched to "The Golden Girls". It wasn't me that made the switch, it was actually the goddess angel Linda. When she was caring for Mum in the summer, she got Mum watching it. Well, time went by, Dancing with the Stars ended and all I was left with were distant memories of the happy times I had, over the summer, with Linda here, caring for Mum..... and the PVR'd episodes of Dancing with the Stars. Watching them over and over and over again. I truly thought that I would stick my head in a pot of boiling water if I ever had to hear that tune that starts off their show... "da da da da da da daaaa..... da da da da dah! Just kill me.
But now it's the Golden Girls. On every evening @ 6:30 on W. I have it PVR'd, and I'll tell you something, we all remember the show.. but I'll betcha none of you have watched it in a while, and it's freakin' funny. So funny, that it actually makes me laugh out loud. Good, solid, comedy. Funny as hell. Give it a whirl again if any of you can. It's a hoot.
What a day ... what a day! I thought I would follow up and let you know just how the waxing went... and it went great. My friend tried some new products on me to reduce the redness and puffiness that always follows, because my skin is so sensitive and she hit the jackpot. It worked. I look normal, instead of a bloated, aged Jack Klugman after a vodka binge!!! Don't get me wrong, it hurt like hell, but it's worth it. I also had the pleasure of a hot stone massage. She gave me a 15 minute trial to see if I liked it or not...... and I did. Never had one before, but will definately have to try the whole 1.5 hrs. Just as soon as one of my kids moves out, and I can maybe afford it.
This afternoon, I had to weed through Mum's closet again, and clear out the clothes that do not fit her anymore. I can see it now, family members that haven't been here in a while are goingto visit this year, take one look at Mum and think "gawd... we should have placed her with the skinny sister!!!!!" Yes, she has put on quite a bit of weight, but I think she looks amazing! However, I think that it's time to curb on the sweets, as she is beginning to pull out of the size 12 now. Its the lack of activity, combined with her sweet tooth that's doing it. Mum was always so active. Walking to Kelly's, the mall etc. Running after Dad, kids etc. Now she is taking it easy. She folds alot of laundry, so she has wicked guns..... but it's funny how you just wind down and lose steam. For almost 80 though, she's a pretty spry cracker!!!
The one thing that never changes, that is always a constant is this...... Women: no matter how old, or how disoriented we get, when those pants won't do up...... it's STILL the dryer's fault!!!
peace out.
But now it's the Golden Girls. On every evening @ 6:30 on W. I have it PVR'd, and I'll tell you something, we all remember the show.. but I'll betcha none of you have watched it in a while, and it's freakin' funny. So funny, that it actually makes me laugh out loud. Good, solid, comedy. Funny as hell. Give it a whirl again if any of you can. It's a hoot.
What a day ... what a day! I thought I would follow up and let you know just how the waxing went... and it went great. My friend tried some new products on me to reduce the redness and puffiness that always follows, because my skin is so sensitive and she hit the jackpot. It worked. I look normal, instead of a bloated, aged Jack Klugman after a vodka binge!!! Don't get me wrong, it hurt like hell, but it's worth it. I also had the pleasure of a hot stone massage. She gave me a 15 minute trial to see if I liked it or not...... and I did. Never had one before, but will definately have to try the whole 1.5 hrs. Just as soon as one of my kids moves out, and I can maybe afford it.
This afternoon, I had to weed through Mum's closet again, and clear out the clothes that do not fit her anymore. I can see it now, family members that haven't been here in a while are goingto visit this year, take one look at Mum and think "gawd... we should have placed her with the skinny sister!!!!!" Yes, she has put on quite a bit of weight, but I think she looks amazing! However, I think that it's time to curb on the sweets, as she is beginning to pull out of the size 12 now. Its the lack of activity, combined with her sweet tooth that's doing it. Mum was always so active. Walking to Kelly's, the mall etc. Running after Dad, kids etc. Now she is taking it easy. She folds alot of laundry, so she has wicked guns..... but it's funny how you just wind down and lose steam. For almost 80 though, she's a pretty spry cracker!!!
The one thing that never changes, that is always a constant is this...... Women: no matter how old, or how disoriented we get, when those pants won't do up...... it's STILL the dryer's fault!!!
peace out.
Wax on... Wax off....
Good morning all.
Well.... today I am nervous. I am anticipating an appointment that I have at noon. Not the "annual female appointment", oh no... MUCH worse than that. Not a mammogram, still worse. Not meeting with the bank to ask for more debt... definately more daunting than that. Today I am having my face and eyebrows waxed. Yep. Waxed.
I suppose it could be worse. I supposed I could be heading for the esthetician for a brazillian, with an anal wax...which BY THE WAY... I am not. In my 42 yrs of living I have only ever had one of those, and I was tricked into it by a friend... waaaay back in University..... Thanks Tami Campbell, I lost my childhood innocence that day.
Nope... just the face and eyebrows. Being in my 40's has brought me so much freedom, wisdom, serenity and confidence, but it's also brough me hair in places that I would rather not discuss. Now on the bright side (remember my mantra), I really don't grow alot of hair and if I do, its really fine and blonde. In fact, my esthetician was against me waxing my lip, chin and sideburns stating that they were not an esthetic issue. But I did it anyway. I really like the feel and look of my skin (after the swelling and blotching dissapates) when I am waxed. In my warped world, when I look in the mirror, I feel better. Look younger. So it's worth it. And my girl is a gifted artist when it comes to waxing. Finding her was akin to finding the holy grail of youth.
My sister waxes her arms, and I may try that next.... just to see what all the hype is about. Maybe I'll do that before Florida. But under NO circumstances will I EVER do my yoo-hoo. A bit of lanscaping maybe, but that's about it. Wax has no place down there.
So that's what's on my agenda for today. I wish I had a diazepam to pop, prior to my appointment, as I would much rather give birth to my 10lb kids again.... than go through the pain of waxing. Geesh. The things we do for beauty
Of course, Mum will join me today. This will be our outing, followed by a trip to the liquor store and then Browns. I really love my little town of Stittsville, and the fact that most people know and love my Mum. The girls @ Browns and the liquor store, and the pharmacy....are all aware that she has AD, and they treat her with the utmost respect. They take her Roger's video card and swipe it through the debit machine, let her do her pin, all the while they are running my PC mastercard and we leave with Mum thinking that she has paid. She always wants to pay for everything..... unless it's over $20. There's another good point for you other caregivers out there, when you encounter problems at the store. Let them THINK they are paying...... it all works out best in the end.
And Mum feels like she has contributed. If I even try to refuse, there is a huge scene that follows. It's just easier that way.
So last nite went very smoothly. Dinner, then bedtime routine. Mum was tired last nite, because I had her folding laundry most of the day. I bet she folded 4 baskets of laundry, and because she was having a good day, she did it perfectly. That, my friends, is a huge help to me and my never-ending laundry issue in this house. See? Dementia does not need to render you completely useless... especially when you have a daughter/caregiver that works you like a dawg during the day. Keeps them honest with a sense of self-worth.
There is a drawback though..... I have to keep constant watch, as for some reason, Mum likes to take my husbands undies and hang them through her closet, hidden of course, but at any given time, I can find upwardly of 15 pairs of men's underwear there. A small price to pay for getting your laundry folded.
So Mum went down with the most minimal of effort. I was pleasantly surprised, but like I said, she was tired. The hot tea and fresh baked cookies that I brought to her room help a little too. AND she slept right through till 3am, which allowed me a few extra hours of zzzzzz.
I am hoping for the same if not better today. She is in the process of getting dressed as I type this, and I am allowing her the privacy to try and do it herself this morning. I laid out her clothes, and made sure that everything she needed was in plain sight. So we will have to see how that turns out.
My children, on the other hand, that's a whole different story, for a whole different blog. They are not in my good books this week, as their laziness and lack of basic survival skills are that of a 2 yr old. Not even, as at least a 2 yr old is TRYING to exercise their right and ability to be independent. Not my kids... they just want it ALL DONE for them. I love them dearly, but right now, I wish I could give them BOTH two weeks notice, with two weeks severance of their allowance, and tell them to get the HELL out. Am I the only one that thinks this way? hmmmmmm....probably.
So I begin my day with a positive post (for all you out there thinking that this blog is depressing). I hope to even catch a visit with Mum... you just never know when she's going to "pop" in. But I'll take Marjorie too.
Oh. I forgot. Today is shower day. That means that I will most likely enter another post before the day's end, describing my experience bathing the 125lb cat. :)
peace out.
Well.... today I am nervous. I am anticipating an appointment that I have at noon. Not the "annual female appointment", oh no... MUCH worse than that. Not a mammogram, still worse. Not meeting with the bank to ask for more debt... definately more daunting than that. Today I am having my face and eyebrows waxed. Yep. Waxed.
I suppose it could be worse. I supposed I could be heading for the esthetician for a brazillian, with an anal wax...which BY THE WAY... I am not. In my 42 yrs of living I have only ever had one of those, and I was tricked into it by a friend... waaaay back in University..... Thanks Tami Campbell, I lost my childhood innocence that day.
Nope... just the face and eyebrows. Being in my 40's has brought me so much freedom, wisdom, serenity and confidence, but it's also brough me hair in places that I would rather not discuss. Now on the bright side (remember my mantra), I really don't grow alot of hair and if I do, its really fine and blonde. In fact, my esthetician was against me waxing my lip, chin and sideburns stating that they were not an esthetic issue. But I did it anyway. I really like the feel and look of my skin (after the swelling and blotching dissapates) when I am waxed. In my warped world, when I look in the mirror, I feel better. Look younger. So it's worth it. And my girl is a gifted artist when it comes to waxing. Finding her was akin to finding the holy grail of youth.
My sister waxes her arms, and I may try that next.... just to see what all the hype is about. Maybe I'll do that before Florida. But under NO circumstances will I EVER do my yoo-hoo. A bit of lanscaping maybe, but that's about it. Wax has no place down there.
So that's what's on my agenda for today. I wish I had a diazepam to pop, prior to my appointment, as I would much rather give birth to my 10lb kids again.... than go through the pain of waxing. Geesh. The things we do for beauty
Of course, Mum will join me today. This will be our outing, followed by a trip to the liquor store and then Browns. I really love my little town of Stittsville, and the fact that most people know and love my Mum. The girls @ Browns and the liquor store, and the pharmacy....are all aware that she has AD, and they treat her with the utmost respect. They take her Roger's video card and swipe it through the debit machine, let her do her pin, all the while they are running my PC mastercard and we leave with Mum thinking that she has paid. She always wants to pay for everything..... unless it's over $20. There's another good point for you other caregivers out there, when you encounter problems at the store. Let them THINK they are paying...... it all works out best in the end.
And Mum feels like she has contributed. If I even try to refuse, there is a huge scene that follows. It's just easier that way.
So last nite went very smoothly. Dinner, then bedtime routine. Mum was tired last nite, because I had her folding laundry most of the day. I bet she folded 4 baskets of laundry, and because she was having a good day, she did it perfectly. That, my friends, is a huge help to me and my never-ending laundry issue in this house. See? Dementia does not need to render you completely useless... especially when you have a daughter/caregiver that works you like a dawg during the day. Keeps them honest with a sense of self-worth.
There is a drawback though..... I have to keep constant watch, as for some reason, Mum likes to take my husbands undies and hang them through her closet, hidden of course, but at any given time, I can find upwardly of 15 pairs of men's underwear there. A small price to pay for getting your laundry folded.
So Mum went down with the most minimal of effort. I was pleasantly surprised, but like I said, she was tired. The hot tea and fresh baked cookies that I brought to her room help a little too. AND she slept right through till 3am, which allowed me a few extra hours of zzzzzz.
I am hoping for the same if not better today. She is in the process of getting dressed as I type this, and I am allowing her the privacy to try and do it herself this morning. I laid out her clothes, and made sure that everything she needed was in plain sight. So we will have to see how that turns out.
My children, on the other hand, that's a whole different story, for a whole different blog. They are not in my good books this week, as their laziness and lack of basic survival skills are that of a 2 yr old. Not even, as at least a 2 yr old is TRYING to exercise their right and ability to be independent. Not my kids... they just want it ALL DONE for them. I love them dearly, but right now, I wish I could give them BOTH two weeks notice, with two weeks severance of their allowance, and tell them to get the HELL out. Am I the only one that thinks this way? hmmmmmm....probably.
So I begin my day with a positive post (for all you out there thinking that this blog is depressing). I hope to even catch a visit with Mum... you just never know when she's going to "pop" in. But I'll take Marjorie too.
Oh. I forgot. Today is shower day. That means that I will most likely enter another post before the day's end, describing my experience bathing the 125lb cat. :)
peace out.
Thursday, December 9, 2010
10 Warning Signs of Alzheimer's
Alzheimer's disease is a progressive, degenerative disease. Symptoms include loss of memory, difficulty with day-to-day tasks, and changes in mood and behaviour. People may think these symptoms are part of normal aging but they aren't. It is important to see a doctor when you notice any of these symptoms as they may be due to other conditions such as depression, drug interactions or an infection. If the diagnosis is Alzheimer's disease, your local Alzheimer Society can help.
To help you know what warning signs to look for, the Alzheimer Society has developed the following list:
To help you know what warning signs to look for, the Alzheimer Society has developed the following list:
- Memory loss that affects day-to-day function
It's normal to occasionally forget appointments, colleagues' names or a friend's phone number and remember them later. A person with Alzheimer's disease may forget things more often and not remember them later, especially things that have happened more recently. - Difficulty performing familiar tasks
Busy people can be so distracted from time to time that they may leave the carrots on the stove and only remember to serve them at the end of a meal. A person with Alzheimer's disease may have trouble with tasks that have been familiar to them all their lives, such as preparing a meal. - Problems with language
Everyone has trouble finding the right word sometimes, but a person with Alzheimer's disease may forget simple words or substitute words, making her sentences difficult to understand. - Disorientation of time and place
It's normal to forget the day of the week or your destination -- for a moment. But a person with Alzheimer's disease can become lost on their own street, not knowing how they got there or how to get home. - Poor or decreased judgment
People may sometimes put off going to a doctor if they have an infection, but eventually seek medical attention. A person with Alzheimer's disease may have decreased judgment, for example not recognizing a medical problem that needs attention or wearing heavy clothing on a hot day. - Problems with abstract thinking
From time to time, people may have difficulty with tasks that require abstract thinking, such as balancing a cheque book. Someone with Alzheimer's disease may have significant difficulties with such tasks, for example not recognizing what the numbers in the cheque book mean. - Misplacing things
Anyone can temporarily misplace a wallet or keys. A person with Alzheimer's disease may put things in inappropriate places: an iron in the freezer or a wristwatch in the sugar bowl. - Changes in mood and behaviour
Everyone becomes sad or moody from time to time. Someone with Alzheimer's disease can exhibit varied mood swings -- from calm to tears to anger -- for no apparent reason. - Changes in personality
People's personalities can change somewhat with age. But a person with Alzheimer's disease can become confused, suspicious or withdrawn. Changes may also include apathy, fearfulness or acting out of character. - Loss of initiative
It's normal to tire of housework, business activities or social obligations, but most people regain their initiative. A person with Alzheimer's disease may become very passive, and require cues and prompting to become involved.
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